Anxiety in the Body: How to Release Nervous System Energy Before You Can Truly Relax
Discover why extreme anxiety makes it so difficult to calm down and meditate. Learn how up-regulating practices like movement and sound discharge nervous system energy, making space for soothing practices such as breathwork, yoga, and meditation to restore balance.
Why Can’t I Just Calm Down?
When anxiety takes hold, it can feel impossible to settle. You may sit down to meditate, breathe deeply, or practice yoga, only to find your body is buzzing, your thoughts are racing, and your restlessness only grows. Instead of feeling calmer, you feel trapped inside a storm of activation.
Do you ever wonder: Why can’t I just relax? Why does my body feel hijacked by anxiety no matter how hard I try?
The truth is that anxiety is not only in the mind. It is a full-body experience, a surge of energy in the nervous system that needs an outlet before true calm can arrive. Understanding this process through the lens of neuroscience and somatic regulation is the key to learning how to soothe anxiety effectively.
At Embodied Wellness and Recovery, we help clients recognize what state their nervous system is in and respond with practices that truly fit the moment. By aligning body, mind, and relationship, we guide people toward lasting nervous system repair and emotional resilience.
The Neuroscience of Anxiety: When the Sympathetic Nervous System Takes Over
Anxiety is the body’s way of preparing for threat. When your nervous system senses danger, whether real or perceived, the sympathetic branch activates:
— The amygdala (the brain’s alarm system) signals danger
— Stress hormones like cortisol and adrenaline flood your system
— Heart rate increases, muscles tense, breath quickens
This “fight or flight” response is adaptive if you need to act quickly, but when it is triggered chronically, your body becomes flooded with activation and has nowhere to release it. That’s why sitting still and forcing calm rarely works. Your body isn’t ready for down-regulation yet.
Why Traditional Relaxation Can Backfire
Have you ever tried to meditate while your heart is racing? Or practice deep breathing while your body feels restless and shaky? Instead of feeling soothed, you may end up more agitated.
This happens because:
— Suppression doesn’t work. Forcing stillness ignores the body’s need to release activation.
— Energy needs an outlet. Without release, the nervous system stays stuck in sympathetic arousal.
— Relaxation feels unsafe. When your body is still flooded with adrenaline, slowing down can actually feel threatening rather than soothing.
The key is not to force calm but to complete the cycle, allowing the body to discharge the activation first.
The Pressure Valve: Up-Regulation Before Down-Regulation
Think of your body like a pressure cooker. Anxiety is the steam building up inside. If you try to clamp the lid down tighter with meditation or stillness, the pressure only increases. But if you open the valve—giving the energy a way out—the nervous system can reset.
Up-Regulating Practices: Releasing Energy
Before moving into calming practices, the body often needs movement or sound to discharge activation. Examples include:
— Shaking out your limbs
— Dancing to rhythmic music
— Going for a brisk run or walk
— Humming, chanting, or singing
— Vigorous breathwork (e.g., Breath of Fire)
These practices provide the nervous system with a release, helping reduce the “buzz” of sympathetic arousal.
Down-Regulating Practices: Restoring Calm
Once the energy has moved through, your body is ready to enter a state of restoration. Now, soothing practices can take effect:
— Slow, diaphragmatic breathing
— Gentle guided meditation or visualization
— Yin or restorative yoga
— Progressive muscle relaxation
— Soft humming or lengthened exhalations
Instead of trying to force calm on a nervous system still flooded with energy, these practices now land deeply, helping the body shift into the parasympathetic “rest and digest” state.
The Key Is Discernment
The most important skill in regulating anxiety is discernment, noticing what state your nervous system is in and responding accordingly. Ask yourself:
— Am I feeling restless, buzzing, or trapped with energy?
➡️ Then I likely need up-regulation and movement.
— Am I feeling depleted, exhausted, or flat?
➡️ Then I may benefit more from down-regulation and soothing.
By tuning in to these signals, you learn to respond with what your body truly needs, rather than forcing practices that don’t align with your current state.
Questions to Consider
— What happens in your body when anxiety peaks: racing heart, shallow breath, restlessness?
— Do you notice trying to force calm when your body is still in overdrive?
— What up-regulating practices have you tried that help release energy before you settle?
Nervous System Repair at Embodied Wellness and Recovery
At Embodied Wellness and Recovery, we see anxiety not as a flaw but as a full-body survival response. Our work integrates:
— Trauma-informed therapy to uncover root triggers
— Somatic practices to release stored activation
— EMDR and neuroscience-backed approaches to rewire stress responses
— Relational repair to restore intimacy and trust in connection
By combining these methods, we guide clients from a place of anxious overdrive toward nervous system balance, resilience, and authentic presence.
From Stuck to Balanced
Anxiety is not simply a mental battle; it is a physiological experience of the nervous system. When energy is stuck, the body cannot simply be forced into calm. By learning to first release activation through up-regulating practices and then soothing with down-regulating ones, you can guide your nervous system back to equilibrium.
The next time anxiety surges, instead of asking yourself, How can I suppress this? But instead, what outlet does my body need right now? This shift can transform anxiety from an endless loop into an opportunity for nervous system repair and a deeper connection to yourself.
Contact us today to schedule a free 20-minute consultation with our team of somatic practitioners, trauma specialists, and relationship experts and begin your journey toward embodied connection, clarity, and confidence.
📞 Call us at (310) 651-8458
📱 Text us at (310) 210-7934
📩 Email us at admin@embodiedwellnessandrecovery.com
🔗 Visit us at www.embodiedwellnessandrecovery.com
👉 Check us out on Instagram @embodied_wellness_and_recovery
🌍 Explore our offerings at Linktr. ee: https://linktr.ee/laurendummit
References
Eisenberger, N. I., & Cole, S. W. (2012). Social Neuroscience and Health: Neurophysiological Mechanisms Linking Social Ties to Physical Health. Nature Neuroscience, 15(5), 669–674.
LeDoux, J. (2015). Anxious: Using the brain to understand and treat fear and anxiety. Viking.
Porges, S. W. (2011). The polyvagal Theory: Neurophysiological foundations of emotions, attachment, communication, and self-regulation. W. W. Norton & Company.
What Your Nervous System Wants You to Know: Applying Polyvagal Theory to Everyday Life
What Your Nervous System Wants You to Know: Applying Polyvagal Theory to Everyday Life
Feeling stuck in a constant state of anxiety, shutdown, or reactivity? Learn how Polyvagal Theory explains your nervous system's response to stress and discover how somatic therapy at Embodied Wellness and Recovery can help you regulate, reconnect, and heal.
Polyvagal Theory in Everyday Life: What Your Nervous System Is Trying to Tell You
Have you ever wondered why you feel chronically on edge, emotionally shut down, or easily overwhelmed in seemingly normal situations? Why certain conversations leave you breathless, your heart racing, or your stomach in knots? These aren’t random reactions; they’re your nervous system sending vital messages about safety, threat, and survival. Thanks to Polyvagal Theory, we now have a roadmap for understanding them.
What Is Polyvagal Theory?
Developed by Dr. Stephen Porges, Polyvagal Theory explains how the vagus nerve, a key part of the parasympathetic nervous system, influences our emotional and physiological states. Rather than viewing the nervous system as binary (fight-or-flight vs. rest-and-digest), Polyvagal Theory introduces a third state: dorsal vagal shutdown, a freeze-like state of collapse.
The three primary nervous system states are:
1. Sympathetic Activation (Fight or Flight): Anxiety, agitation, anger, racing thoughts
2. Dorsal Vagal Shutdown (Freeze): Numbness, disconnection, fatigue, depression
3. Ventral Vagal State (Safety and Connection): Calm, presence, attunement, engagement
Understanding which state you're in can illuminate not only your emotional experience but also the health of your relationships, sexuality, and ability to feel connected to yourself and others.
Are You Stuck in Survival Mode?
If you live with trauma, chronic stress, or unresolved attachment wounds, your nervous system may default to high-alert patterns. This is especially true for individuals with complex trauma histories or those who feel stuck in sympathetic nervous system arousal:
How Polyvagal Theory Applies to Intimacy and Sexuality
If you've ever felt like your body "shuts down" during sex, or if conflict with your partner sends you spiraling, Polyvagal Theory can help make sense of it. Safety and connection are prerequisites for desire and vulnerability. If your nervous system is in a defensive state, it will prioritize survival over pleasure.
At Embodied Wellness and Recovery, we specialize in working with individuals and couples to restore nervous system safety in the context of intimacy. Whether you’re navigating sexual trauma, low desire, or disconnection in your relationship, we approach the healing process with compassion, neuroscience, and somatic tools.
Signs You May Benefit from Nervous System-Informed Therapy
— Difficulty setting boundaries without guilt or fear
— Feeling chronically overwhelmed or easily triggered
— Shutdown, avoidance, or numbness during intimacy
— A tendency to people-please or over-function in relationships
These aren’t personality flaws. They’re adaptive survival strategies rooted in nervous system dysregulation. With the right support, they can shift.
Listening to What Your Body Has Been Trying to Say
Your nervous system is not the enemy; it’s an innately wise, protective system shaped by your history. But you don’t have to stay stuck in the same loops. Through somatic therapy, polyvagal education, and compassionate support, it is possible to build a felt sense of safety, foster intimacy, and feel at home in your own body.
At Embodied Wellness and Recovery, we offer trauma-informed, nervous system-focused therapy that supports deep, sustainable healing. Whether you're seeking help with anxiety, intimacy, or trauma recovery, our team is here to guide you toward regulation, connection, and embodied wholeness.
Reach out to schedule a free 20-minute consultation with our team of top-rated therapists and take the next step toward a more regulated nervous system today.
📞 Call us at (310) 651-8458
📱 Text us at (310) 210-7934
📩 Email us at admin@embodiedwellnessandrecovery.com
🔗 Visit us at www.embodiedwellnessandrecovery.com
👉 Check us out on Instagram @embodied_wellness_and_recovery
🌍 Explore our offerings at Linktr.ee: https://linktr.ee/laurendummit
References:
Dana, D. (2018). The Polyvagal Theory in Therapy: Engaging the Rhythm of Regulation. New York: W.W. Norton & Company.
Porges, S. W. (2011). The Polyvagal Theory: Neurophysiological Foundations of Emotions, Attachment, Communication, and Self-Regulation. New York: W.W. Norton & Company.
Van der Kolk, B. (2014). The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind, and Body in the Healing of Trauma. New York: Viking.